Thursday, January 8, 2015

In which things are rambled about in a philosophical manner. Again

Most things in life, we have no control over. The only true choice we have is how to react to what is unfolding in front of us.  The feeling of control, and the feeling of loss, of that control is illusionary.  Once that is accepted, anxiety, fear, and disenchantment wash away.  Having a plan is much the same, once events are set in motion, there is no way to back out, one has to see the ride through, to the end... whatever that is. A sane person wouldn't try to jump off a roller coaster mid-ride, and the same must be said for life.

The appearance of beginnings and endings is a trick. A trick to compartmentalize moments and events on a timeline we feel attached to.  A way to comprehend and rationalize seemingly random and unrelated events.  Most people will not attempt to trace a series of events back to it's root, they will say Event A is wholly separate from Event Q, not realizing that A-Q, and beyond, are interconnected and binary. Binary, in that there are two elements at play:  One that is actual, and one that is perceived. The actual is the inseparable, the perceived is the rationalization.

Trying to take the enormity of life at a glance is like trying to jump to the top of a mountain in one leap.  It is insurmountable and crushing.  The early stages of insanity begin when trying to understand... Looking for a reasonable explanation in a world born of chaotic order.

There is a sentiment that people enjoy saying, "I don't regret my decisions and past, because if I chose differently, I wouldn't be exactly where I am." While true, most take that saying at face value, never looking for deeper meaning, or the connective tissue that led along the path.  It becomes even worse when trying to predict future events, applying laws and rules of rational thought to unformed thoughts and actions and events, is fruitless and a waste of energy.

One can hope for certain outcomes or events.  One can prepare for what they perceive to be the worst possible outcomes.  Any attempt at preparation without ALL the information will be found lacking. Who is to clearly judge when ALL the present?  When is it deemed enough?  Why stop preparing?  Or, better, why start?

Everything can change in an instant. On a personal level, the change occurs the moment we perceive it, even if events leading to that moment stretched for hours, days, or years past.  Despite this heavy and somber tone, I am not uniformly speaking of sad or unfortunate things.  I am also thinking of the beautiful, great and fulfilling things in life.  In retrospect, it is easy to trace the sequence leading to something's demise or end, such as someone's death or a division of people on any level.  But, difficulty lies in understanding what led to something's beginning, such as a tree sapling taking root, or the first time two people recognize shared love and trust.  In trying to gather ALL the information that led to these things, one must begin to accept that the starts and ends are much the same, in that they are the product of it's opposite, at some previous instance.  Living under the pretense that we are separate beings, living apart from all else is false, and will lead to ruin.  Living with the understanding that we are connected to absolutely everything else, and that anything and everything has it's own reaction and circumstance, will lead to deeper meaning and understanding of the path.

Each of us has their own personal path to journey, or cross to bear, but our lives intersect with so, so, so many other people and things, with each intersection, we share a bit of ourselves.  If we were see a map of each time we were  bisected, eventually we would understand that at some direct or indirect level, our maps would begin to blend, and become the epic tapestry of life, ever-changing, everlasting.

Again, who is to say where it began?  Who is fit to judge the end?  I believe the truly important questions are:

How did you react?

What did you learn?

Did you make an impact?

Where will you go?

Beginnings and ending are given too great an importance, it is the paths chosen, the life lived, the lives touched, the legacy left that is important. Cherish the gifts and punishments while they last.  Each is beautiful, educational, and dangerous in it's own way. We each get one life and body; make the most of it. Enjoy the hell out of it.

Live a life to be proud of.  Be a person others are proud to call Friend. Tell a tale to bring the house down.